Romance conversations I saw online today
A midweek check-in, no recommendations, just vibes
Hey folks! I happened to see three separate but compelling things related to romance today as I browsed through the internet procrastinating from other things, and I wanted to share! Should I send more midweek check-ins like this if I see a romance-related post or meme? Let me know!
An oldie but a goodie tweet
This excellent tweet came up today in my feed because the OP added something new to the thread. See link for nothing but golden takes in this thread by one of the co-hosts of my favorite romance podcast Fated Mates.
Why do straight women wanna fuck mob bosses?
Click here to read the full post. My favorite bit from the break down:
“For women fantasizing about criminals, villains, monsters, and anti-heroes, it's very often about the idea that someone like that - intense, violent, with single-minded focus, and immense power - would love her, want her, always put her first, go against all his instincts/training for you without a second thought and be a clear and present danger to everyone but warmth and safety for her and only her, and burn the world itself down for hurting her in even the slightest of ways. It's a sexual version of the fantasy of having a pet tiger, one that would never, ever attack you or hurt you in any way.”
I agree! I read my first ever mafia romances recently (Dark Mafia Prince by Annika Martin and all the Mila Finelli books aka Joanna Shupe) and while they’re definitely not my personal thing, I get the catharsis of them. It’s the reason why I so often don’t love friends-to-lovers stories, because that’s my actual love story with my husband and it’s extremely boring to me.
Which is extremely healthy in real life! I don’t want a romantic past with my partner to be fraught and traumatic and dangerous! I’m glad we never had a dramatic third act breakup! I’m glad he’s not running a criminal enterprise! Do I wish he would sometimes be a little meaner to me but in a fun catty way? Sure. I’m broken like that. But my dear love is a cinnamon roll through and through and, truthfully, I wouldn’t change a thing. There’s a reason we’ve been together a decade and can count the number of actual fights we’ve had on a single hand that’s missing a few fingers.
I’m able to separate [even non-supernatural/fantasy] narrative love and my preferences from my actual opinions on love and relationships. Even my very favorite romance novels are full of characters that in real life I’d want to shake. Which is what makes them ideal narrative vehicles! I often worry that as a culture we are losing our ability to understand fiction and art in a nuanced way beyond the binary of “problematic” and “non-problematic” (the latter of which is literally not a thing, for the record), and nowhere is that conversation clearer than romance.
Me, explaining the intricacies of humiliation kink to my highly disturbed husband:
Meme courtesy of this Reddit thread.
Humiliation kink courtesy of The Shame Game by Hannah Murray which I finished yesterday.
Have a great rest of your Tuesday! What are you reading right now? Have you seen any great romance memes or conversations online recently? Do you have thoughts on the stuff I compiled for you here today? Let’s talk!
ICYMI, last Friday I recommended books with neurodivergent leads, and THIS Friday I’ll be recommending books about couples who are already married at the start of the book! Be sure to share this post with your friends so they too can get new recommendations every week.